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Thoughts and words of a dreamer, and an aspiring online writer.

Fresh Air Spray

Based on the article of WayOdd News.

When it comes to rented or owned apartments, I support the right for silence and clean surroundings. It is not a place for loud jams and it is also not a place for excessive smoking. Part of living in place near people is respect for their space and way of living as well. The hallway or lobby becomes a common ground. So again, a certain amount of consideration is observed.

So based on what happened in the article, the woman who sprayed the air-freshener made a point. Her violation, in this case, provides reason for her action. I’m not saying she is right for what she did, but her misdeed made sense.

I would like to know how environmentalists handle stories like these. Hilarious as they may be, there was still something in the event that harmed nature. It’s also a matter of the law because on both sides, there was violation of human rights.

Though if I were in the hallway witnessing what happened, it would take a lot of time before I could stop laughing. Oh how odd people could be! Hehehe!

Fixing fixing fixing!

Hello! Today, I continued fixing things and my mind keeps going “What else? What else? What else?” I’m not the “list” kind of person, for some reason I fret someone else might read it. But each day I try to label and keep something, and so far I think it somehow is going well. I started with 4 empty plastic containers and now 2 ½ are already full. Just a few days more to hit the mark. Perhaps it’s just natural to get a few confusing jitters when packing.

On times like these I also ponder on having assistants. The kind in the movie of Sex in the City where someone fixes your stuff when you’re all messed up. Part of the bargain is to give up a bit of that privacy. I do have a helper, not the assistant kind but it gets things done. With fingers crossed I just keep on going till the day comes.

Other than that I get glued surfing and surfing and surfing for images. I have PS 7.0 and I miss my PS CS 8 where I can use most brushes. It’s fun to learn and create images sometimes.

Okay, so far that’s my buzz. I’m glad to have something shared again.

On the 6th day...

Hi! Okay, I haven’t been giving blog entries for the past 6 days now. At first, as expected, I got frustrated because I set myself some standards. A flow of insecurities took over and thoughts came one after another. I just needed to accept things like this really happen. But, I don’t want to wallow on self-pity, I simply wanted to share how things turned out for the past days.

It actually started by having nothing to write about. I kept on reading but my reactions were brief, I couldn’t extend it to 3 paragraphs long. Then I started to surf for images and inspirations; mostly scrapbook backgrounds so I can lay-out my page where I type. I use MS Word when typing and I put different backgrounds to fancy it a little bit. Then it still wasn’t enough so I surfed for fonts. My laptop has too many dull plain fonts and I can’t even delete them. Then the other day I got sick. It was too hot and dry I couldn’t even function. So I had my massage and rested. Then yesterday out of surfing I landed on a dangerous site and my pc hit a virus.

During my writing dilemma I focused much on fixing my things. Which is actually good because I’m about to leave soon. So even if one thing is not accomplished another is done. The days gone by made me reflect on how at times I get to be talkative and now that I have a page all to myself for all to read I have not much to say.

So here I am, 6 days later, finally having something to write about. Hehehe!

World leaders, why free the terrorist bomber?

Reaction to Syracuse News.

Recently, I have been noticing several stories of victims of injustice. It is typical to read grim narratives in newspapers, though I have observed quite a lot today so I thought to have this entry as my way to empathize. The Flight 103 seems the most tragic.

Terrorism. I never understood why people take joy in harming others. Even if numerous movies, documentaries, books, and articles explain how from childhood they start, it is still a hard truth I cannot just accept. I try to feel when I could and reach out in ways like these because I don’t know how I would be able to manage it when it happens to me.

What disturbs me more is this is something people of power allow to happen. Why do they set people like the bomber free? Shouldn’t the world leaders make a stand and do what they can to show the world that acts like these are not allowed? I can imagine the courage of published writers putting their lives at stake by telling the people about what others had done. But if they, and us, as private citizens, voice out our indignation to these dreadful crimes, shouldn’t our leaders be able to do more?

To be aware of these unfortunate outcomes is important because it gives you that oneness with humanity. I agree, it should not be a daily dose in life for it can truly be depressing. But once in a while it makes a difference to reach out.

This is my way to tell the world that I CONDEMN TERRORISM. This is my part to show compassion to the inconsolable victims they have destroyed.

Loud Conversations

Inspired by the article of Robert M. Thorson.

Loud cellphone conversations and loud live conversations are both annoying. Even if there are more people who talk via cellphones it is still annoying. I agree. People should be more considerate of others nearby when they broadcast their lives. Or when they do, they should not be offended if others would comment or react on their actions.

It’s a matter of class and decorum, loud-mouths are more often known of less panache. The more discreet you are, the more mysterious you become. The less you reveal about things about you, the more guarded you are of reputation.

Though it’s still about blending well with others around you. Out in public the space is shared and respect towards others is expected. You have more freedom when you’re in your room where you have more privacy. Just imagine in a bus alone, each passenger would have their own thoughts then you start talking loud. You’ve been on both sides so you know how bothersome it could be.

Yes, it’s a free world. You’re not told not to talk at all. You can, but be modest when you speak. Though cellphone lines were never known to be clear when you’re outside. All the more it may be useless to talk in public unless it is truly important. If it’s not necessary, then it’s best to have your chit-chats privately.

If you insist on talking loudly, then be ready if someone butts in and meddles with you. Lucky if the interruption is for friendly purposes. But negative reactions could also be expected.

Talk with style… the quiet way.

My Ancestor - The National Hero

There is a famous Filipino proverb -

“Ang hindi marunong lumingon sa pinanggalingan ay hindi makakarating sa paroroonan”

It means –


That quote lingered in my head as my aunt recently reminded me of our noble heritage. In my blood run the genes of a National Hero. He largely contributed to my country’s history through his sublime intellect in law and literature. With great pride, I introduce you my ancestor –

Living the proverb I mentioned above, I take this moment to remember my “Lolo Panyong” ([Great] Grandfather Epifanio). It is an immense honor being a member of his family to be part of the distinguished legacy he left us. Thus, I say these words in his presence;

Dear Lolo Panyong,

First, I would like to say thank you for the grand heroism you imparted in the Philippines, and the remarkable title you bestowed on our name. Your life will forever define the roots of our patriotism, and our dignity as a Filipino.

Kindly bless me with your gifts so I may inherit even just part of your intellect and talent in literature. Touch my mind and soul and pass on the grace you have had in the field of arts and letters. Help me find my way as I search for my role as a writer, and give me strength as I move on each day.

I ask you this as your fellow citizen, and as your great grand-daughter. Your powerful guidance may lead me in the right direction, and may continue to contribute to the prestige of our lineage.

Thank you very much! I am very proud of you.

Respectfully,
“BigTumTums”
Your Great Grand-daughter

Community Parks


Image source: http://macsystems.com/Jan05-2008.jpg

Inspired by the article of Beth Reinhard.

For Children.

On any village, town, or county, there will always be children from newborn to teens who would expect a play area near their home. It becomes an afternoon routine to leave the corners of the house and go to the swings and the slides, the sandbox and the grasses and the water fountains to have fun. They look forward to that time of day for meeting playmates and playing games. Parks for children are a second home. The moments spent become memories in their later years.

For Families.

Not only is it a place for the community’s little darlings, but also an area of recreation for families. The barbecue picnics encourage interaction and quality time spent between kids, moms and dads, and relatives, and even friends. It’s a change of atmosphere from the daily space of home, and more room for running and playing, reading and basking under the sun. An ideal Sunday afternoon treat for dear loved ones.

For Neighborhood Residents

It is a common ground for people living in the unit area to get to know one another, and possibly be friends. This is a good move for safety because everyone would know everyone, and could warn each other for dangerous strangers. Together they can come up with activities and events to encourage development and communication within their community.

For Health & Green Environment

The park becomes a hub for a healthy lifestyle. It becomes a sports venue and a zone for biking, skating, jogging, and walking habits. The fresh green grass and trees in the park provides positive flow of oxygen as it enlivens nature throughout the place.

All in all, the community park gives more benefits than budget hassles in the residential vicinity within the city or town. The money allotted to keep the parks alive would be worth it for the children, the families, and the people who use it for healthier relationships and lifestyles. Closing it down should never be an option.

Bad gum behavior

Reaction and inspired by the article of Don Ferguson.

Our manners and etiquette weigh deeply on our reputation. A price popular people pay for the simplest mistake they do caught by the media. Unfortunately, our society is not so forgiving. A lapse in these manners are ridiculed and laughed at, worse it can be spread all over the internet.

A fact about having good manners, is you hardly get noticed when you follow suit, then you are put in a spotlight when you misbehave. Someone from the older generation will probably give you an earful and tell you that during their time such attitudes are unacceptable.

Just like most, I also don’t have a high positive record on manners and conduct. I am not as dainty as women are known to be. However, I try to behave as much as I could.

I have to be true to say that proper behavior does count and it is worth practicing. Certain acts are really not pleasant to the eye, and modest etiquette does give you class. There are places where such decorum is a must, and we have to respect that practice.

Ferguson may give examples of gum chewing but it is still a courthouse. It is not a fancy mall or a disco or a movie-house where less manners are tolerated. It is a place where people’s respect and sensitivity is very much counted because a person’s right is at stake. Clearly, it is not a place where to chew gum.

For someone who has worked in a courthouse, people chewing gum in court should be an insult for you. It should be a place you give high regard to and it would be reasonable to comment on people who disrespect it by chewing gum. Be courageous to say that they need to learn proper etiquette because such practices are done in a courthouse.

But to have a sign at the door would truly be disturbing for the community, because the rule of “no gum chewing in the courthouse” should be naturally given.

A loner's culture

Inspired by the article of Saritha Prabhu.

I am a solitary being from a social country.

In my Asian land (Philippines), especially if you stay in the metropolis, majority of the people you know have close family and friends. You see them around malls, movie-houses, commercial eating spots, and most of all- night life hang-out areas. Cafes like Starbucks becomes a pal hub, filled with caffeine chat-mates sharing stories.

The consequences of my size and history made me adapt to the life of being alone. From fate, it became a choice. Then eventually I discovered the joys of just being by myself. Examples like watching a favorite movie on a couch, or dipping on a tub, marathoning a series, reading in a quiet space, etc… There will always be a part of me who will enjoy these kinds of freedom.

Though too much of something is also not healthy. I admit I also get lonely. That is how I realized how true the saying is that “man is a social being” and “no one is an island.” From time to time I also would like to talk to people and know what is happening. Thus, a balance is needed.

Saritha’s article focused on the pros and cons of culture, and I completely understand what she meant. It would be hard for a born and raised American citizen to see how different it is for us foreigners in their land. But knowing how one culture varies from another keeps us grounded. We do not forget our roots, it is part of who we are, and we value them.

For me, the individualist culture of America is a positive blend with my solitary nature and social yearnings. Then with their social structure, I also remain collective, strongly bonded to my family. Through this way, there is balance.

A murky system


Image Source: http://media.buffalonews.com/smedia/2009/08/11/16/568-0812adamz.standalone.prod_affiliate.50.jpg

Reaction and inspired by the article of Margaret Sullivan.

One of the mediums I rely on in balancing truths is the media. Even if oftentimes they take advantage of their power, their competition keeps them grounded. What I’m saying is we are not stuck in one resource alone. There are various forms of media that can help us decide and study on what is really happening. Fortunately, many people are obsessed in knowing what is happening to the system. Their analysis guides us in finding the real facts.

Thus, they become voices when something wrong is going on. In this case, public records are not easily given and it is a human right. Many dishonest people that are into power deprive us from this freedom to know. It is very clear and simple, they make it so consuming and laborious. So it is logical to doubt and suspect because the people we are suppose to rely on are not transparent.

The important part is, it was noticed at the exact time it was not given, at the very moment the privilege was disrespected. It shows the truth and cannot be labeled as propaganda or gossip. Then it will be remembered come election time when the power shifts to us to put the right person in place.

Ok, so what’s my point? We should be aware when someone in our system deprives us of this kind of right and claim justice at the exact time it is done. It is our responsibility as part of a society. Then let us not forget what this person did when it is our turn to choose who to put in power. I stated the article because it was a good example.

Margaret did the proper thing in fighting for justice. We are entitled to the truth.

Baby For Sale...tsk tsk!

Reaction and inspired by WayOdd News.

Baby selling is not new news. Various odd things have happened (and still happening) in our world that impressing someone is not easy anymore. It is actually a threat kids hear (and I heard when I was young too) to behave. Of course nannies say it with jest but quite an effective strategy for children to do good.

I am neither a mother nor a nanny. This is so because I’m aware of the huge and serious responsibilities of the role. It also means I know how terribly depraving it could be to put a price on a breathing baby. Buying one’s dignity is corrupt as it is, all the more the situation of purchasing a life.

For the sake of argument, let us see the positives. It is better than abortion, and whoever buys could be serious in raising a child. But that does that make it acceptable? Does that make it okay? Does that make selling the child forgivable? I see it as a lesser evil but it is still wrong.

I do not want to sound too righteous because it’s truly different when you hold the crying infant and you have nothing to feed. On that moment, anything becomes reasonable and you would not give a damn about morals. However, we still need to say and remind the right values on what lead the person to be in a dire situation. We have to admit that along the way, wrong choices were made. It may be consequential to carry a hungry baby but before you reached that state you had the power to choose. Thus, for us to remind people what is moral makes sense.

It is commendable for Joel to let the media be aware of the sale. Balancing it by concealing where offer took place. I did not expect it to come from a hip young popular band guy from Hollywood. His move gave me an idea how mature he is as a family man even if he lives and is surrounded by a carefree modern world.

In the end we still stand firm to say selling babies is wrong.

These days...

For days and days I’ve been surfing the net jumping from page after page searching for something to write about. I was embracing the vast and wide space of information superhighway, finding inspiration to react on certain things. Anyway, not much have caught my attention long enough for me to expound further. So, instead of reacting to someone’s article this time, I’ll just tell you the results of my online journey.

The first set of writers I explored on were the opinion columnists of online newspapers. I became curious on their positions on current events, and from the news what catches their attention. Obviously, majority leaned on politics which is a topic I try to avoid. Then as my clicks and reads went on, as you will see from the previous blog entries, most became really serious. My writings need the light side too. Thus I decided to stop surfing opinions columns for a while and surf and search for another resource of information.

Other blogs are also fun to read. There are those though, whose entries remain puzzling especially if the topic is too personal. Of course! We are just visitors, so how can we know. It would help if what they talk about is something we relate too.

I must remember the reason for my blog – it’s not just a diary but a training ground for online earning possibilities. It is my writing exercise. So now what? I still want to keep on searching, and reading, and reacting and writing. I can do this! Hehehe!

In the meantime… yippee! I have a blog entry.

Read, watch, and listen responsibly

Reaction and inspired by the article of Paul Murray.

The people in the media strongly influence us in life. May it be written, said and shown from paper to internet to radio to tv, we cannot deny how it has endlessly tested our beliefs and our morals.

The sad truth about people earning from our sorrows and shame is not new. It is a brutal reality we accept and even guilty of at times. A person’s crucial fault or embarrassment is entertainment for us. But when it is us who get to the hot seat, we conceal our darkest shades at most we can.

There is a difference though when the media professional take responsibility in being sensitive to his/her work. When there is a balance in respect between the featured person and the watching or listening or reading public. Humiliation should never be an option. You must, as a public relations worker, know what is right and wrong, what is hurtful and what is not. It should also not be done for reputation, but for personal dignity.

Paul was right in writing as a protest on how two adults publicly handled the case of the young teen. It would have been water under the bridge if the talk show were not hitting high ratings. When it is something that makes the majority listen, then rules should truly be followed and not the money. It is not a change-the-station solution because as he said the program goes on.

It would be utterly frustrating if the public continued to patronize the program simply because it was hot news. If that happens, then Paul was right, we truly have lost our moral compass. Just when media people can be strictly scrutinized by the people who value the dignity of man especially the young.

This also serves as a lesson for us at the receiving end. These are the giants who earn from our attention so we have the power to show them what is acceptable to us and what is not, that we will not allow such wrong-doings to happen. We already know that not all that we see, hear, or read our correct.

Let us be responsible on what media injects in us.

Written daggers

Reaction and inspired by the article of Diane Williamson.

Insult, no matter how it is delivered, it is still a severe blow to anyone’s character. It is seriously important to be tactful on any comment or discussion for it not only stakes your dignity, it also affects the society.

I am a victim of unpleasant social preference. My huge size is not favorable to the majority. I receive harmful feedbacks, reactions, gossips and comments and they oftentimes gravely disturbed me. If only for the name of justice they could get a strike of their own attack. Nonetheless, I learn to guard my words because I know how hurtful they can be.

Free speech? Sure! If a certain someone’s existence, attitude, words, reactions alone aggravates every nerve of your system, you can vent it out on someone you trust. You can lay your litany of complaints and irks as long as it is not seen by those who may not understand you. There are really those kinds of people. I also air out my rants and ramblings to the ones I can confide in when the “pricks” are around. That is controlled free speech.

The line crosses the moment the expression gets direct without just cause. They may be there and they may irritate me, but I cannot hit (not physically) them because they did not do anything to intentionally harm me personally. The same way, it’s different when the person strikes you directly with insults or degrading responses. That is when free speech gets wrong.

In the case of Diane’s article, it is clear for a cause for punishment because the comment came from sworn public servant. The moment you promise the law to be given the right to correct society, you also promise to be a role model. That is a respect you earn. That’s the difference between the actors and politicians. Actors entertain us as their job, they do not have responsibility towards us. Politicians do because they took an oath to serve our society. They have social responsibilities.

Whether you are an officer or not, even if you are just a simple citizen, you are adult enough to know that to speak negative about others is wrong. They do not only cause injury to their feelings, they terribly destroy lives.

I enjoy soaps

Inspired by the article of Roger Ayala.

Just like any kid on the block, I think most of us had gone through a stage when soaping and bath became a chore. The fun was different when we were toddlers blowing bubbles. We lose this kind of hype during adolescence. I was not an active kid and even I tried to escape the bath routine.

Then I remember one afternoon in school when I watched my teacher wash his hands and face. It was hot and humid and kids perspire from running and playing so it gives you the idea how the environment was like. So to see my teacher do something different caught my attention. He did not know I was watching. But his actions changed my attitude towards cleanliness. He looked so refreshing! I was encouraged to copy the habit.

I like the touch of the bubbles and the suds to the skin. How on the first wash the soap turns grayish or brownish due to dirt then on the second wash it becomes really foamy and white. You feel so pure and clean, light and soft after washing. It gets even better when the soap gets scented like orange and melons. That is why I enjoy washing my face and hands. I hardly put creams and ointments on it.

This might give you an impression that my face is spotless. No! My face is oily with pimples and even has a black shade. I actually envy the Asians who are porcelain-skinned. I needed to say this to be real.

My fascination for soaps does not end there. I got introduced to bath salts and various spa effects that make your bathroom more than just a cleaning spot but a relaxing space. The scrubs that smoothens your skin, with soft towels, together with scented oils and candles with jazz music, are enough reasons to stay longer in the bathroom. You feel fresh and rejuvenated afterwards.

I’m not an avid spa buff (even if I want to I cannot afford it), but I do enjoy the pampering once in a while. However, bubbly and suds washing, and foamy scrub baths plainly explain why I enjoy soaps!

My country's mother


Image source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/stephenjantacanay_002/3776694119/sizes/m/
Image upload: http://www.petaimg.com/u114/726c2.jpg

During the past days of my writing absence I have been glued to the tv and been surfing the internet related to the passing of Philippine former President Corazon Aquino. The floating soul collector had been quite abundant with famous people since late last year and early this year. Mainland USA’s top listed Michael Jackson and Philippines’ own Francis Magalona are among them. Countless articles, blog entries and videos roam the internet paying tribute to their memory. I was never swayed to flow with their currents and join the mourning majority until now. It’s not that I think less of the previous departed ones, but perhaps my words to praise and regard them had already been said. This reminiscing entry is different because I rarely write about local issues of my land. As much as possible I discuss on issues where most can relate.

But why Cory? Her matriarchal legacy. Her as a mom not only to her children but to a nation. I was moved and touched and just found myself drawn to know more about her last moments. Then tears naturally flowed off my eyes when times in her rites became emotional. It’s an mysterious caress to the heart.

These are the bitter realities- Cory and I are not even acquaintances so the mourning is clearly one way. As the president, she was not the Philippines’ best. She did admit she lacked knowledge and experience, she was put in the position solely for her husband’s name.

However, Corazon Aquino was truly the icon of democracy. A vigilant voice in Philippine politics, and always found in religious catholic practices. Why is Cory different? She doesn’t ask you for anything for her own benefit. She does not ask for you to vote for her, she does not ask you for money. Her lifestyle does not involve anything corrupt, and was never in secrecy. Everytime she is sought and found, it is always in a place of worship or in a place to reach out to the needy. She was someone who strongly objected to the wrong, and showed you what is right. Again, she never asked you anything for herself, it was always for the others. She was selfless.

Thank you Cory for everything.


Image source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/edaltares/3793305355/sizes/m/
Image upload: http://www.petaimg.com/u380/534c1.jpg

A Citizenship issue

Reaction and inspired by the article of Leonard Pitts Jr.

I try not to see this with American political color. But the issue was too tempting to discuss. I’ll talk about it stressing the common sense and the system applicable to all. So let’s take out the Pres. Obama part here.

Birth and Citizenship. Truly simple and logical; easily connected to a yes or no answer, or green is go and red is stop solution. Naturally, the common answer to your citizenship would come from “where were you born?” It is definitely on a certain country’s soil somewhere in this planet.

I will give myself as an example. I am a Filipino. I was born and raised in the Philippines. It is where I grew up, studied in school, the native language I speak (Tagalog), the people I knew, the food I became accustomed to, the issues and history I followed, etc… A huge part of my identity belongs and comes from that land. It is a plain natural truth.

The complex issues and problems are there and clearly there are systems that deal with that. Our country’s census has piled rules and regulations to follow to justify, certify and record our citizenship. The most common would be having foreign parents, which for me could be solved by stating your choice within 24 hours since birth, firm and locked early on. The bulk of problems are from trail of documentation, following steps one to infinity, needing the seals and signatures to confirm your identity. We admit that a huge number of people try to cheat the system especially those of dark pasts. Nevertheless, strict enforcements to rules can control these.

It still boils down to anyone who gets questioned of their citizenship even if the legal proof is obviously there. If the seals and signatures are genuine, and the document is rightly recognized by the country, then to question your identity would totally be senseless. To even add proof that it is a land where you grew up and lived for most of your life would make all those who doubt totally ridiculous. It is a total waste of time, attention and money to hype it up in the mainstream.

Grading Teachers


Image source: http://orvsd.org/system/files/u7/Cartoon_teaching_OVSD23.jpg

Reaction and entry inspired by the article of Rick Green.

The role of the teacher is important to me because I used to be someone who hated going to school. I stubbornly repelled from bulky memorizations, quizzes and exams. It took years before I enjoyed learning. Through experience and time, I was able to analyze and comprehend teachers. How their methods in academics can have so much power and impact, not only making the students learn but also making them grow and make a difference in their lives.

Certainly, we have encountered mundane teachers who enter the classroom and relied most of the hour reading and paraphrasing the subject reference book. Then would have high guts to dare a quiz he himself cannot answer without looking at the book. But there are also teachers who come to class with just the attendance, talks, even cracks a joke or two to enliven the students, fills the board from end to end with notes. I am struck with awe and I give high regard and respect to those teachers. There are also some whose subjects are simple, yet their method is so complex – PE or Home Economics for instance. They ask for term papers and interviews, you put so much time and attention for a minor subject. Then the teachers whose subjects are important such as Math and Science, teach us in simplest systems; lesson – quiz – lesson/review – test. The most wanted teachers are those who can converge learning and playing. They come up with educational challenging games that turn boring lessons to exciting ones.

In Rick’s column, I agree in his protest because their manner of deciding is obviously biased and unfair. It is reasonable to create a balanced analysis for a just outcome. A simple grade or score card for each teacher is a more acceptable way to decide. Thus, there will be less complaints because a study was done for the result. The criteria for analysis are:
- test result for their subject qualification
- rate of students passing per year
- student evaluation
- tardiness, attendance, and school involvement.

Lay-offs are serious moves. You cannot just choose who will stay or who will go as if you’re playing darts or literally taking the rotten apples of the basket. Especially if you’re in public office, where you give importance to your reputation and how people respect you.

My thoughts on- Story/Fiction Writing

During my late grade-school and high-school years, our school trained us on creative writing. I never knew I would miss it this much as I do today. It should have been a habit I carried on. Nevertheless, I can still try and as of now convey my thoughts on story/fiction writing.

I believe it starts with a one-line gist:
- a young lady tourist bumps her head in a foreign land and gets amnesia, then falls in love with a resident who helps her find her identity.
- a murderer’s adventure to be one step ahead from authorities then what careless move puts him behind bars.
- an ill-stricken patient’s journey from knowing his terminal diagnosis to serving as an inspiration for a well lived life.
Anything ordinary and normal twisted and turned, disturbed and destroyed, then fixed and developed producing growth, lessons, and finally a positive outcome.

For the writer there is a movie, a scene, a picture in his mind and the first set of sequence of events gets formed. He begins with the exposition of the story.
- the lady browses the travel brochure and pack, and the resident commutes to work as his daily routine.
- the victim hurts the killer’s ego, or resembles someone from his disturbed past, the killer studies the move of authorities by being a cop himself or by helping another victim.
- the patient lives a life as if tomorrow will always be there; becomes frugal and saves, did nothing but work, hardly communicated with anyone.

So the early half of the story easily transforms from the writer’s imagination to words on a document. Then it evolves and grow from there. With the continuous flow of creativity, the writer follows a backbone and study for the story to form.

Currently, there is no movie in my mind even if I squeeze my brain to come up with any. Hehehe! But do I have ideal imaginations? Yes, a lot! Is it something that people would like to read? Maybe, I doubt though (forgive my pessimism). But as of now that’s how I understand how stories and fiction novels are written.

A poet named Robert

Inspired by Robert's book.

Through the means of online chat I met Robert – a talented published poet. Recently, he shared a part of his writing craft and I feel honored by his kind gesture. Try seeing the world through his poems, and you will see a genuine expression. Something uplifted from the soul destined to move man. I’m not going to put excerpts but my reactions here can present on how I grasp it as a reader.

In Robert’s writings, it showed the true struggle and life of a writer. Unless perhaps the high-grade professional pen scribblers who produce columns and articles with excellent diction and vocabulary with ease, there are writers who don't weave words these fast and compose this way. It is not some magic wand or computer generated software which can instantly create publishable works. Writers get blocked too often and inspiration comes from time and experience. Then when you read their works, you see through the words that beyond it is a life, is a deep expression, a turmoil of feelings. I believe that’s what makes Robert’s poems truly artistic. He did not just sit and jot down what came to mind. No. He lived the day, contemplated on his path, stirred his soul, challenged his weakness, and saw beauty in unexpected places and circumstances.

There are two poems that stood above the rest which touched me – What Matters Most, and What We Need. The first mentioned is strong enough to be a daily mantra. Not only is it written beautifully, it also gives you that boost for self-confidence. It is the kind of poem you would frame and read everyday to feel good about yourself. There are two lines in What We Need that make me like it, it gives self-acknowledgement. This is not something people say due to pride, but in the poem when they read it, they can say it to themselves. It’s about knowing what you need more than the practical things of daily life.

Robert… continue to inspire us.

Small yet powerful

Inspired by the article of Catherine Cunningham.

I was reading this article and found it different from most simply because of a huge impact caused by a tiny creature – a mouse. It’s odd because the puny animal hardly ever knew that his existence amounted to such a commotion. Though small as he is, he becomes news to read.

Catherine shared a planned weekend with her father and his beau Judy. What was supposed to be family-filled time spent turned out a mouse-trap chase – literally. From noticing unusual dog behavior, to setting a trap which unfortunately failed (even having peanut butter land on a kid’s ankle), until one unexpected evening all it needed was a bowl and perfect timing. I begin to think that it wasn’t the catch that gave all the fun to it, but the adventure of the chase. It also became quality family time for working as a team for the trap. The little crawler was big fuzz enough to land in a newspaper article. He barely had an idea that some story and news was done due to his existence, he simply continued on living.

Through this reading we see how control is important to humans. There was a big difference when the mouse (as Catherine stated) looked harmless in a pet store walled glass, and when the mouse was lose and we did not know its whereabouts. Once it was hidden and unseen, we become like witless warriors trying to outsmart an enemy who hardly knew he’s into battle.

Amazing how something so small can make something so big. Strangely, this story gave me some kind of hope as a beginner. If that tiny mouse can do it, then there is a huge possibility I can do it too… and even better.

Paperbacks over Kindle

Inspired by the article of David Ulin.

Due to low finances, I cannot afford to be as tech-savvy as most are these days. Latest or current models of ipods and mobile phones are not stuff I possess. All I have is laptop, and I got it as a holiday present. I’m doing the most of what I can from it, and having strong hopes it can be a tool to earn someday.

This article taught me that there is such a thing called Kindle (a white flat e-book hardware) and it is on the mainstream market. For someone like me who enjoys reading- this can come handy. However, it maybe my old-fashion nature to still prefer the paperbacks. Not only is Kindle a can’t-afford, it can also be a not-so-like material.

Why the classic old binds? Yes, they may be bulky but they are simply open and read. No recharges, no e-stuff complexities, no heavy on the wallets, no stress and tension if it gets lost, and (just like what David pointed out) no unwanted deletes. It may be slim and handy, but as of now it’s expensive and impractical for a consumer like me.

Clearly, as again explained in the article, the idea is for profit and gain. It gives the reader more choices for comfort. Though it still boils down to books and reading being a channel for self-improvement, and David is right that no commercial should manipulate.

With the paperbacks, we get what we pay for; entertainment and knowledge. So tech can get more techie if they want. Do I feel left out and old fashioned with the changes? Not as much. I still get entertained and learn, and that’s the most important part.

The not-needs to be out

Inspired by the article of Tony Hicks.

De-cluttering my stuff is a tough challenge. This is a MUST I have to do these days which I haven’t done for numerous lame reasons. I am one of those people strongly attached to simple valuables which end up in bulks eventually.

There will be a huge transition in my life soon (sex change… hehehe…jk) and for me to get there I have to fix here. As someone who has difficulty letting go of things, these are some reasons why I tidy up. I write this not just to share, but to motivate myself to move.

To breathe. It’s nice to see space and inhale. To see there is more room (to fill again… hahaha). It gives that refreshing aura.

For health. If you are like me who is forever in self-search, part of finding myself is to take out the not-needs. On every single thing I hold when I fix that becomes a question “do I NEED this?” This is like bargaining with your conscience because of the attachment. Hehehe!

To give and move on. You know that the smile with whom you give it to is priceless. I confess and admit this is also not easy to do, especially if the thing is truly special for me. I make the level of worth as equal as possible. But I also see it as a rite of passage. I cannot take the next step unless I clear and finish where I am now. Part of growing and living healthy is cleansing, and that means to let go of things I do not need.

Just imagine those struck by tragedy who are FORCED to move on; like fire and hurricane victims. My heart goes out for them. Their homes, EVERYTHING they valued all gone. As I reflect I begin to appreciate having this privilege to sort my treasures.

It’s my time to unclog my stuff and continue my life.

My thoughts on - Selfishness

Inspired by dyhowel's blog.

When it is positive.

I strongly relate this to self-love. I’m a believer that more often selflessness is unhealthy. We are not some God nor higher being to constantly have the energy to contribute good things to mankind. At some time recharge is needed to be able to continue to share. In fact, the more we love ourselves (oftentimes by being selfish), the more we get energy to spread the love we have in us.

The right timing to be essentially selfish is when being nice or being generous or being loving gets to be a chore than a willing act. Suddenly helping a friend or family gets us cranky or gives us resentments which are destructive. We lose our strength and we need to focus on ourselves again during these times.

An afternoon or evening of time alone to breathe and reflect, pamper or spoil yourself can make a lot of difference. A relaxing night dipped in a tub, or marathoning a series you enjoy, or an afternoon watching the sunset on a cliff with an amazing view of the beach or ocean, etc… Be firm on unplugging yourself from all the ties, the responsibilities, the invitations, the calls – be selfish. You’ll be revived, refreshed, and ready to go back to the world after that.

I think these are the reasons for retreats, vacations, cruises, spas, hotels, etc… They are ways to be selfish, to tell the world “this is for me.” It’s time to recharge.

When it is negative.

When it gets too much. Society casts us that stone when we lack balance. When we get too selfish, more often we get greedy, and this is always very much linked to money and wealth. Given that life is never fair, but it’s still reasonable to say excessive selfishness equates to you always having more, and others having less and thus this is wrong.

A glass may need refilling, but it does get full. A battery may need recharging, but it gets full charged. Our body may need rest, but it does get re-energized. Just as we see our limitations that we need a break from time to time, we are also aware that our selfishness can only go to a certain extent. If we go beyond this, nothing gets better, it only gets worse.

Balanced selfishness is good food for the soul.

Laugh with me: The Strangest Wal Mart Customer

Oh I need some laughs... The lines in bold are the ones that did for me... Hehehe!
Source: http://www.onlyfunnystories.com/StrangestCustomer.asp

Dear Mrs. Denner,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and may be forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Denner are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House-wares to go off at 5-minute intervals
- omg! every 5 minutes... hahaha!

July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, "Code 3 in House-wares. Get on it right away."

August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.
- well literally it's still a wet floor... hehehe!

September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
- ugh... this is gross!

November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
- hahaha!... I wish I could do that... nice move... hahaha!

December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
- this is a good dare to do with friends... hahaha!.... I would really laugh on the spot when I see someone do this while I'm at Wal Mart.

December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his "Madonna look" by using different sizes of funnels.

December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
- this sounds corny for me.

December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fatal position and screamed "OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!"

December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"
- hahaha!... what if the booth started to smell?... I'd like to see how the staff would react.

Once again we cannot tolerate this behaviour in our store.

Regards, Wal-Mart (Thanks Bradley)

The pen keeps scribbling


This is truly what I feel at the moment.

Today, I got some upliftment from my dear sweet sister and some nice people who gave kind words (like Crash here in blogspot). Thank you thank you for the support! So from that unpleasant state of emotion, I got that spark of excitement again and continued my online adventure.

So I surfed and surfed, searched and searched, then landed on a site that actually made me feel worse. The writing was excellently expressed (vocabulary and composition), it seriously tore the very little esteem I had to go on. Oh this is terrible! I was feeling so bad that I started laughing at how this is driving me nuts. Hehehe!

But I don’t want to stop. I can’t afford to, especially if I have plans on making this a career. Adding variety and changes in my writings is a bright suggestion I got so I can improve on this craft. It’s a bit of an edge that I enjoy reading and I’m willing to learn.

So… still with the fingers crossed… I’ll let my pen continue scribbling.

-oOo-

Dear Crash,

Thank you for the comments on my blog. I don't know how you found me, but I can't find a way to track you back. So I'm taking this chance that you drop by my blog again and get to read this and see how much I appreciate your support and attention. I hope in some way you can send me a message and I can have a channel to respond back.

Thanks!... :)

Sincerely,
BigTumTums

A Down Day

On any field anyone is into in this world, there is that certain spark of expertise that comes naturally for them. A musician would know much more about songs than a simple listener, a cook would know more about cooking than a regular diner, a teacher would know more about the academics than a current graduate. There is a natural “must know” for each identity or role for everyone. Not only is this seen in the professional world, but so in personal interests such as hobbies. A tv series regular viewer would be familiar with the episode, a singer fan would know the album and single, an author aficionado would follow the book releases and its plots.

My education and degree is strongly connected in the field of writing – Literature. Compositions of poems, stories, articles and essays should be somehow easy for me to do. These days however, I have been challenging my ability to write and I have been failing and it had been sinking my esteem. It raised questions about my skills and aptitude as a person. Why can’t I do it? How come I am willing and it can’t happen? This is not supposed to be as difficult as it may seem, but I still get nothing! I am frustrated.

But I don’t want to wallow on self-pity. My willingness to make it is still there. I just want to share and use this as therapy, it might make me feel better.

Writer’s block… it effin sucks!

Reflecting on Simplicity

Today, I find myself a bit restless of the pace where my life is leading. I could not find contentment that whatever I’m doing now could truly be the right path for a future that I see. I ask myself, “am I on the right track?” It took several hours of surfing before I got an answer – I realized my tools as of now are limited so I’ll just settle for what’s there. I’ll just make the most of what I’m doing right now.

Far from that first paragraph, one of the blogs I commented on today talked about simplicity. It’s nice to reflect (once in a while) on simple things that give us joy. It makes us grounded and not be swayed by the complex wave of modern technology. They can be beneficial but they can also widen gaps.

The profession of my brother in-law greatly revolves around this hi-tech world we have. His bread and butter comes from his labor clicking and punching keys. From sun-up to starry nights he faces the monitor. But, at the end of his day, he would spend like an hour or two watching his fishes in his small aquarium. He unplugs himself from the techie world. Isn’t it amusing?

What is something simple that makes you happy? Kindly share, thanks!

Two Lovely Seniors

Today, I was in line for a cab service and there was an old couple who fascinated me. I was actually having a day of unpleasant circumstances; didn’t have enough sleep, had to go somewhere I didn’t want to, I ran short on cash… But when you’re highly hyped or motivated on something (as I am now), not even unwanted events can ruin your mood.

So, back to the seniors, they looked lovely! The woman was standing beside me and beside her was her husband. They quietly waited for a cab, peeking to the left as each car passed by. They would say a word or two to bide the time, like when a driver gets picky with his passengers. What amused me is how they seem to be free and independent. They were travelling by themselves and enjoying on their own. I don’t know why, but they made me feel good. I doubt if they knew that in a short amount of time their presence could have an impact on someone like me. I wasn’t curious on what they did in the mall or where they were going, I simply enjoyed watching them and waiting with them for the cab to arrive.

There’s really something magical about babies and seniors right? They give us that refreshing aura that’s a bit magnetic (what a word! Hahaha!) Have you had an experience similar this? Do share. Thanks!

Reading and reacting.

Today, I started getting glued to reading blog posts and commenting on some. As I explored different sites, I realized:

1. Not all blogs have the style as I was accustomed to. I’ve gotten used to the ease of access to read other posts of fellow writers of the same host site. It actually became challenging at first, but I was able to find a way. However, it would be nice if the hosts could channel their members to groups so it’s easier to find fellow bloggers of same interests and turning strangers to friends.

2. As writing became a challenge for me to fill the pages, it’s nice to find out that my short posts could actually be a good thing. People love to share a lot about themselves that some blogs get to be long and exhausting to read.

3. Giving reactions sometimes is better than adding a post. Especially at times (like this) when I have not much to talk about and say, reading or listening becomes easier. Not only do you get to know more about certain personalities of humanity, the blogger appreciates someone noticing his/her writing efforts.

Do you sometimes get into that reading mood? I’m enjoying what I’m doing right now. :)

I'm in!

Today, I finally joined the blogspot community. I belonged to others before, I wonder what hindered me. Perhaps I wanted to be unique in certain ways. I didn’t want to squeeze my spot where most were at, it’s like pushing your way in a long line of users. Well now, giving it a try might do good after all.

I was actually half-decided until I saw this template. It became 50% of the reason. Nice huh? The kind of setting I’m accustomed to; it generates ideas and helps me convey my thoughts clearly. I’ll try to post as much as I could.

Anyway, how did your day go? Mine was nice! Something I needed after such a low time (oh don’t ask). It was an enlightening day actually, the kind when you get all hyped about an idea and your mind keeps on going. That gives a natural high yeah? You feel good about yourself.

In the meantime, I’d like to explore the community first, doing some reading and comments. I find it fun, it’s like having a good conversation. So for now… all I can say is… I’m in!